Democrat in effective speech shocker

August 12, 2006

Huggable John Kerry pointed to the exploding shaving cream as an example of the failings of the Iraq war to have any positive impact on terrorism yesterday, while Dick Cheney granted us a full insight into the fiendish workings of the suicide bomber’s warped mind by telling us that the defeat of pro-war Democrat Joe Leiberman would obviously encourage the enemies of freedom. Ha.

Kerry struck out in a short speech, pointing out that five years into the mess of Iraq we’re still facing terrorist plotting, and security budgets in several US cities have been cut to pay for it all. He waxed lyrical about the ignored recommendations of the 9/11 commision. And he almost bubbled over the wrath about the sheer distraction that Iraq presented.

Meanwhile, uberfascist extraordinaire Dick Cheney pointed to the results of the Democratic primary in Connecticut as a red flag for those “al-Qaeda types”. Eh? What? The war in Iraq, that is, the invasion of a middle-eastern country by an aggressive superpower, is going to discourage terrorism, but the Democrats’ choice of Senate candidate for Connecticut is going to get the flags burning all night?

You can practically see it. Ozzy bin Laden and his crew, hanging out in the cave, watching CNN on the portable TV while OBL’s dialysis machine’s going through its daily chore, watching the results of the Democratic Primaries and lamenting about how poor old Saddam’s fall from grace has really taught them a lesson. Suddenly, Ned Lamont unseats dear old Joe Leiberman, and it’s AK-47s at the ready! This kind of thing is exactly what being in al-Qaeda is all about!

No, Dick, no. Al-Qaeda are not interested in who gets to be the candidate for the Senate. They are not jumping up and down with barely-contained glee at the thought of a cable TV magnate being up for election. They aren’t going to draw encouragement and support from Ultra-fundamentalist Leiberman supporters. And even you can’t be serious if you reckon you can spin this into a TWAT issue.

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